hazel rae.

dear hazel.

seven weeks ago you were born. so i guess you could say seven weeks ago was your birthday. your actual day. you made it just in time baby girl. we needed you here. did you know that day was amazing? martin luthur king jr day. one of my most favorite monday holidays. you were the cutest, most beautiful. all squeaky and new. i couldn't wait to snuggle you so i ripped you from your mom's arms and held you and kissed your cheeks for as long as i could. your eyes were wide open when we first met while my eyes were full of tears. 

i can't wait, hazel rae, to spoil you for your whole life and to love you even more. we're the luckiest to have you here.

part one: confessions of a diet coke addict.

the other night whilst we were sound asleep in our bed. not a creature was even stirring. all the sudden we are awoken by some sort of clatter. danny got up to see what was the matter. and i was just completely freaked out. thinking we were getting robbed. and then not being scared anymore once i realized no one would rob us, we have like two things. after he searched the house we just came to the conclusion that someone, somewhere, must have dropped a bag of marbles. so we went back to sleep. guess what it ended up being? some idiot (me) put a diet coke in the freezer and forgot about it. so for the last 2 days i've just been cleaning up frozen diet coke. 

just some stuff.

i'm still thinking about the oscars and it's been like over a week. i don't care what anyone says adele is like the songbird of our generation. she killed it at the oscars. like i wish i could do that. also i feel like silver linings playbook should have received more awards. buuuut i guess i'll settle for jennifer lawrence falling up the stairs and winning best actress.

i've been practicing my headstand for yoga. and i know it probably sounds easy to all my readers (mom and erika, hi!), but i am STRUGGLING! i have been seriously working on it for over 3 months now and i can barely do it against the wall. i'm just so terrified of it for some reason. i'll keep you posted.

i did our taxes. for the first time ever. usually my mom does them for me, but i decided i should grow up. and i did them. and they got accepted. and i am just so happy. and i can't stop bragging about it to everyone that i meet. like random check out girl at the grocery store. i'm not joking. i seriously told a check out clerk at target. and i encouraged her to do her own too. like WHO AM I?

i'm obsessed with snap chat. i can't stop snap chatting. i'm pretty sure that is my pogo, i snap chat too much. (if you aren't sure what i just said, then i'm just real sorry).

i've been testing gum brands and flavors for the last week or so. my jaw hurts so much. but my breath is minty fresh.

later.

sis.

can i get serious for a minute and tell you about my baby sister? even though she is a grown woman with two babies, i will always see her as my little baby sis.

she is smart and talented. like really talented. she makes the simplest thing seem like the most beautiful. she has always been there for me. through everything. my little side kick and bff, even when we wanted to punch each other in the face. which i actually did do one time. what?

she is funny. like really really REALLY funny. i catch myself just laughing at everything she says.

she is loyal.

and i just love her a lot.

skiing.

we went on a ski trip this last weekend and it was such a good time. aside from skiing we went snowshoeing, toured temple square, shopped a lot, and ate food until we were pretty sure we would explode. plus we got stuck in a huge snow storm up cottonwood canyon and i have never been so scared in my life. i was shaking and almost in tears when we made it to the bottom.

i love spending time with danny. it's like my top favorite thing. making memories with him is the best thing i do.

this one time.

this one time. i was sitting in the living room. and my dad walks by with a hot dog in one hand and a 10 pound fish in the other. i never laughed so hard.

this one time. my dad kept telling me that i needed a pocket knife. he kept putting a camo colored one in my purse. and i kept taking it out. then finally i took it out and ran to the car. he chased me out and waved it at me as i drove away. he's never laughed so hard.

this one time. i came home with a fake glitter tattoo on my shoulder. my dad was sitting in the kitchen and i put on my best acting face and told him that i needed to tell him something. "i got a tattoo." he promptly stood up. walked me to my room. closed the door. and sternly said "don't tell your mom." then his face quickly changed to amusement and said "what tattoo did you get? this will be our secret." when he found out it was fake, we never laughed so hard.

i miss his laugh and i missing laughing because of him.

the one year mark came. and it was hard. and it was sad. and it almost felt like it was day one again. but somehow i feel inspired. i feel inspired by other's love and generosity. i feel inspired by kindness. i feel inspired by my dad's memory. by his legacy. by what he did in his short time here on earth. and even more inspired by all that he did for me in the short time he was in my life.

weekendz.

hi you guyz. so in case you didn't know, danny and i had to buy a new battery for the jeep this weekend. and that's how i found another reason that being an adult is stupid. if you didn't know danny and i only have one car. and normally i'm sure this wouldn't be a big deal. but we're not normal. danny works in springville and i work the furthest north in provo you can go. so it's not that fun. and spending money on gas is even worse. the plan last december when i sold my car was to just get a new one. 9 months later after going back and forth on which one i wanted, i decided this week is the week that i'm gonna woman up and just go get what i want. keep your fingers crossed.

we saw the movie looper. i was really mad that i had to go cause i wanted to see pitch perfect. so i threw a fit and said the only thing that would calm me down was a big drink and kettle corn. and cafe rio. and a new shirt. i only got two of those things. but i would say a 50% success rate for a woman with my demands is pretty good. anyway i only felt guilty for a minute once i realized looper is my new favorite flick. yeah there were weird cheesy parts, but i was oddly into it, and i'll probably see it again.

danny got the iphone 5. i am only a lot jealous. but mostly just happy for him. he has been waiting for the iphone 5 since i met him. seriously i don't know why, but he had his mind set on it and even when the 4 and the 4s came out he wouldn't budge. he waited it out. but get this, he had a FLIP PHONE before this. seriously, a flip phone. so i am happy he has upgraded. but also, get this. he used up all his data in 3 days. OOPS. so he is on probation until the 8th. 

bye.